No Room at the Top: America's Christmas Number Ones, 1958-1990
In Britain, the Christmas number one is a national sport. Bookmakers take bets on it. Bands time their releases to it. Over here, nobody ever bothered. The Hot 100 kept publishing straight through the holidays, and whatever sat on top the week nearest December 25 got the title by default. Nobody campaigned for it. Going by this archive, almost nobody wrote for it either.
Lay out all 33 Christmas charts from 1958 to 1990 and the pattern is hard to miss. Exactly one genuine Christmas record reached #1 that week, and it did so in the very first year. After that, the American Christmas number one was simply whatever pop happened to be doing that December: space-age instrumentals, a singing nun, Philadelphia soul, disco, a power ballad from a hair band. No song managed it twice. It's a stranger and more honest list than the British one, precisely because nobody was trying.
| Year | Chart date | Song | Artist |
|---|---|---|---|
| 1958 | December 22, 1958 | The Chipmunk Song | The Chipmunks With David Seville |
| 1959 | December 28, 1959 | Why | Frankie Avalon |
| 1960 | December 26, 1960 | Are You Lonesome To-night? | Elvis Presley With The Jordanaires |
| 1961 | December 25, 1961 | The Lion Sleeps Tonight | The Tokens |
| 1962 | December 22, 1962 | Telstar | The Tornadoes |
| 1963 | December 28, 1963 | Dominique | The Singing Nun (Soeur Sourire) |
| 1964 | December 26, 1964 | I Feel Fine | The Beatles |
| 1965 | December 25, 1965 | Over And Over | The Dave Clark Five |
| 1966 | December 24, 1966 | Winchester Cathedral | The New Vaudeville Band |
| 1967 | December 23, 1967 | Daydream Believer | The Monkees |
| 1968 | December 28, 1968 | I Heard It Through The Grapevine | Marvin Gaye |
| 1969 | December 27, 1969 | Someday We'll Be Together | Diana Ross & The Supremes |
| 1970 | December 26, 1970 | My Sweet Lord/Isn't It A Pity | George Harrison |
| 1971 | December 25, 1971 | Brand New Key | Melanie |
| 1972 | December 23, 1972 | Me And Mrs. Jones | Billy Paul |
| 1973 | December 22, 1973 | The Most Beautiful Girl | Charlie Rich |
| 1974 | December 28, 1974 | Angie Baby | Helen Reddy |
| 1975 | December 27, 1975 | Let's Do It Again | The Staple Singers |
| 1976 | December 25, 1976 | Tonight's The Night (Gonna Be Alright) | Rod Stewart |
| 1977 | December 24, 1977 | How Deep Is Your Love | Bee Gees |
| 1978 | December 23, 1978 | Le Freak | Chic |
| 1979 | December 22, 1979 | Escape (The Pina Colada Song) | Rupert Holmes |
| 1980 | December 27, 1980 | (Just Like) Starting Over | John Lennon |
| 1981 | December 26, 1981 | Physical | Olivia Newton-John |
| 1982 | December 25, 1982 | Maneater | Daryl Hall John Oates |
| 1983 | December 24, 1983 | Say Say Say | Paul McCartney And Michael Jackson |
| 1984 | December 22, 1984 | Like A Virgin | Madonna |
| 1985 | December 28, 1985 | Say You, Say Me | Lionel Richie |
| 1986 | December 27, 1986 | Walk Like An Egyptian | The Bangles |
| 1987 | December 26, 1987 | Faith | George Michael |
| 1988 | December 24, 1988 | Every Rose Has Its Thorn | Poison |
| 1989 | December 23, 1989 | Another Day In Paradise | Phil Collins |
| 1990 | December 22, 1990 | Because I Love You (The Postman Song) | Stevie B |
Chipmunks, Then Nothing
The first Christmas chart in this archive, dated December 22, 1958, is the only one that behaves the way you'd expect. "The Chipmunk Song" by the Chipmunks with David Seville sat at #1, three sped-up voices squabbling over a hula hoop, on its way to four weeks on top. Behind it were the Platters' "Smoke Gets in Your Eyes" and the Teddy Bears' "To Know Him, Is to Love Him," two of the loveliest ballads of the decade, both stuck behind a cartoon. So the honor roll opens with a novelty record and never gets a proper Christmas song again. Thirty-two years, and that's the one.
What followed was an early-sixties grab bag. Frankie Avalon's "Why" took Christmas 1959 with a single week at #1, the only week it ever got. Elvis, back from the Army, spent Christmas 1960 asking "Are You Lonesome To-night?" and held the top for six weeks. The Tokens' "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" ruled a chart dated December 25, 1961, Christmas Day itself, which is about as close to a tradition as the Hot 100 ever came. A year later "Telstar," an instrumental named after a communications satellite, gave a British group the American Christmas number one a full year before Beatlemania. Then 1963 delivered my favorite top three on the whole list: "Dominique," a Belgian nun singing in French, at #1 on December 28, 1963, with "Louie Louie" by the Kingsmen sitting at #3. The sacred and the profane, two spots apart, a month after Dallas. If you wanted a snapshot of the country that December, there it is.
The British at the Fireside
The next three Christmases belonged to England. The Beatles' "I Feel Fine" topped the chart of December 26, 1964, holding the Supremes' "Come See About Me" at #2. Christmas 1965 went to the Dave Clark Five and "Over and Over," a chart dated December 25, 1965. It managed one week at #1, and I'd argue it kept two better records off the top: the Byrds' "Turn! Turn! Turn!" at #2 and James Brown's "I Got You (I Feel Good)" at #3. Then came "Winchester Cathedral," the New Vaudeville Band's megaphone pastiche of the 1920s, on top for Christmas 1966 with Donovan's "Mellow Yellow" and the Monkees' "I'm a Believer" behind it. Three Christmases running, the country's holiday number one arrived with a British accent, and one of them was a joke about a church.
The Monkees took the title back for America in 1967 with "Daydream Believer," and the Beatles had to settle for #3 with "Hello Goodbye." Sitting between them at #2 was Gladys Knight and the Pips' "I Heard It Through the Grapevine." Hold that thought. On December 28, 1968, the same song was #1, only now it was Marvin Gaye singing it, seven weeks on top in all. Stevie Wonder's "For Once in My Life" was #2 and the Supremes' "Love Child" #3, a Motown sweep of the Christmas podium. No song on this list held the Christmas #1 twice, but "Grapevine" is the one that came closest, taking two different singers and two different Decembers to get there. Diana Ross and the Supremes closed the decade with "Someday We'll Be Together" on December 27, 1969, one week at #1, a farewell dressed as a promise.
Roller Skates and Mrs. Jones
The seventies opened with the closest thing to a hymn the list ever produced. George Harrison's "My Sweet Lord," paired with "Isn't It a Pity," sat at #1 on December 26, 1970 for the first of four weeks. Then the decade got weird. Melanie's "Brand New Key," a song about roller skates that everybody assumed was about something else, held the top on a chart dated December 25, 1971, with Sly's "Family Affair" and Don McLean's "American Pie" right behind it. Christmas 1972 went to Billy Paul's "Me and Mrs. Jones," three weeks at #1 for a song about adultery, with Helen Reddy's "I Am Woman" at #2. That's a lot of grown-up business for the week of the Nativity.
The middle of the decade was quieter, and quicker. Charlie Rich's "The Most Beautiful Girl" got two weeks at Christmas 1973, with Jim Croce's "Time in a Bottle" at #3. Helen Reddy's "Angie Baby" and the Staple Singers' "Let's Do It Again" took 1974 and 1975 with one week at #1 apiece, the Staples edging out the Bay City Rollers' "Saturday Night." Then Rod Stewart planted "Tonight's the Night (Gonna Be Alright)" on a chart dated December 25, 1976 in the middle of an eight-week reign. A seduction song on Christmas Day. Nobody blinked.
Disco finished the job. The Bee Gees' "How Deep Is Your Love" led Christmas 1977 over Debby Boone's "You Light Up My Life." Chic's "Le Freak" was on top for Christmas 1978, six weeks in all, with the Bee Gees' "Too Much Heaven" one place behind. And on December 22, 1979, the decade signed off with Rupert Holmes' "Escape (The Pina Colada Song)," a story about a man answering a personal ad and finding his own wife on the other end. That's the seventies' last Christmas number one. Nobody could have scripted it better.
Physical, Faith, and Somebody Else's Christmas
The eighties began with the saddest entry on the list. John Lennon's "(Just Like) Starting Over" was #1 on December 27, 1980, less than three weeks after he was shot dead in New York. Five weeks at the top, and every one of them felt like a wake. A year later the mood swung as far the other way as it could go. Olivia Newton-John's "Physical" held the top on December 26, 1981, in the middle of a ten-week run, the longest reign of any song in this table. From the Chipmunks to "Physical" in 23 years is a fair summary of what happened to pop radio.
Then there's the odd little rivalry that ran through the middle of the decade. Daryl Hall and John Oates topped a chart dated December 25, 1982 with "Maneater," while Michael Jackson and Paul McCartney's "The Girl Is Mine" sat at #3. A year later the pair had swapped positions: "Say Say Say" by McCartney and Jackson was the Christmas #1 of 1983, six weeks in all, with Hall and Oates' "Say It Isn't So" at #2. Come Christmas 1984, Hall and Oates were still hanging around at #3 with "Out of Touch," three straight Decembers on the podium without ever getting back to the top, while Madonna's "Like a Virgin" took the crown on December 22, 1984.
The late eighties read like a radio dial. Lionel Richie's "Say You, Say Me" for 1985, with Eddie Murphy's "Party All the Time" improbably at #2. The Bangles' "Walk Like an Egyptian" for 1986. George Michael's "Faith" for 1987, which at least has the right word in the title. Poison's "Every Rose Has Its Thorn" for Christmas 1988, the one power ballad on the list, and proof that by then even the hair bands wanted a slow dance in December. Then Phil Collins' "Another Day in Paradise" on December 23, 1989, a song about a homeless woman being ignored on the street. It's the only record in 33 years that seems to know what month it is, and it does so by refusing to be festive.
The last Christmas in this archive, dated December 22, 1990, went to Stevie B's "Because I Love You (The Postman Song)," a freestyle ballad that held off Madonna's "Justify My Love" and Bette Midler's "From a Distance." Not a sleigh bell in earshot. Which is the point. Add it all up and you get one novelty Christmas record, one nun, one Hare Krishna chant, three solo Beatles, five songs that lasted exactly a week, and one that lasted ten. The British can keep their tradition. I'll take the list where nobody planned anything and the country told the truth anyway.
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